• Jilly

Overcoming Fears and Abuse | Muay Thai 2nd Anniversary |

Updated: Nov 13, 2021


*trigger warning*


On this day, 2 years ago, I decided to learn how to fight.


On this day, 2 years ago, I decided to leave all my fears behind and learn how to defend myself.


I've been a victim of an abusive relationship, I remember so vividly those times where I am just left taking hits without being able to defend myself.



Well, here I am 2 years after training, able to throw punches that can easily incapacitate someone, kick high and strong enough to cause concussions.


Muay Thai is the fighter sport I have been training since November of 2019. As much as I like throwing punches in video games, being able to do it IRL is something I've always feared. Hurting people is not something I am comfortable with and hurting myself is definitely not something I don't want to experience back then.


However, after that painful experience, things changed.


There were times where I wore long sleeves to hide the marks, lie to the people I love to protect an abuser, look at myself in the mirror as I rub aloe vera to the bruises while hating the girl I am seeing.


After months of self-loathing and a series of experiences that increased my self-confidence (enrolling in pole and aerial hoop, living independently in Cebu etc) I finally decided to take up a striking sport. I had a choice between boxing, muay thai or jiu jitsu.